Monday, April 11, 2011


I got it about a year ago now. I have wanted this image as a personal tattoo for about 5 years. I held on to it and never got it because the people I was around judged me for it, told me they'd have less respect for me. I already had a celtic tattoo on my left shoulder blade, and they frowned when they saw it.

The tattoo on my left shoulder blade is in memory of my grandfather, Jack. He passed away when I was 13 from a massive heart attack. He just dropped to the floor, gone instantly. My grandmother, Rose, was distraught and sold the house they had shared for 40 years almost immediately. I snuck into his bathroom and took the handle off his cabinet door. And it is that symbol that is on my shoulder. It means a lot to me. It symbolizes family. I cannot be ashamed of it because it reminds me of my Poppy.

Oddly enough, Titanic (1997) came out that year. My grandfather's name was Jack and my grandmother's name is Rose. I cried like a baby the whole movie. I haven't been able to watch it since. And not watching a movie for the last 12 years that was the biggest grossing film until he decided to top himself this year with "Avatar" is no easy task.

It was the same year that my cousin was shot 4 times in a robbery. He lived despite all odds that he wouldn't and through the miracles of doctors they re-created a lot of internal organs for him. I watched him in the hospital, visited him as often as I could, cried for him, hoped for him. He finished college, he got married and though he was told he'd never had children, he has a beautiful baby girl.

That tattoo reminds me of when I was 13 and thought I'd lost all of my family to tragic and quick ends but realized I hadn't. That I can't bring back those that are gone, but I will live for their memory. It symbolizes to me so much more than ink on skin. It's a part of my life.

The same goes for this new, secret tattoo I am sharing with the void. This triquerta means a distinctive link between the physical, mental, and spiritual parts of self. It means past, present, future. And people may judge me for it...But -

I am who I am. And that is good.


  1. I'm sorry, this may be overstepping boundaries of me, but I think that anyone (that already knows you well as the person you are) who tells you they'd have less respect for you because of something you put on your skin, has no respect for you already. Shocking.

  2. My boyfriend at the time said it to me...

    I'm glad for your input - the only boundaries are set by the limits of truth, so feel free to comment. I value your opinion.

    It was both shocking and hurtful...He said {this was after we'd moved in together} that if he'd met me and I had visible tattoos, that he probably wouldn't have spoken to me. At his family functions, I wore long trousers and was encouraged to wear shirts that covered my shoulder. A big part of me getting my third tattoo was saying to him and to myself that I am more than just my body and to love me means loving all of me - tattoos, freckles, little scars from childhood scrapes, crinkles in my eyes - everything.